Archive: Loving Wolves I

By Hirondelle

ORIGINALLY POSTED ON THE NORTHLANDS: MARCH 10, 2007

I used to think it might be quite difficult to live with and love a Wolf, but now I know better I thought I would share with you my thoughts on this.

Wolves are easy to feed. They eat pizza, lots of it. And lasagne. They will eat Thai food too and look cute when they eat chilli and their nose runs.

Wolves live in the moment and although this is a wonderful thing is sometimes means you have to remember that the past and the future aren’t quite as real to them as it is to you. If you say you are stressing about something that might happen next month they may look a bit blank for a moment, until you explain.

Wolves like to drink beer in the evening but never dirty glasses because they drink out of the bottle. They don’t like beer in cans. It takes a while for wolves to find beer they like, but once they have found it they are happy and all the searching was worth it.

Wolf like snuggling, a lot; it seems you can never over pet a wolf.

Wolves look sad when you shout at them so you should try and not shout at them very often unless it is really necessary for your own mental health.

Wolves can sometimes be hard to wake up in the morning and sometimes you have to use unusual methods. Always try and have coffee nearby when waking up a wolf.

Wolves are willing to help around the house but don’t always notice when help is needed (tidying the house because the maid is coming makes wolves chuckle). It is ok to tell them you want help though, and they don’t think it is nagging. They feel bad if they forget to do something you asked them to do so this is the best time to ask them for a foot massage.

Wolves also like having their paws massaged and if you put your tongue between their toes their eyes roll back and they can’t speak.

Wolves sometimes get tears in their eyes when thinking or talking about people they love.

Wolves ask a lot of questions that don’t have answers – especially in shops, and when they are doing this to shop assistants it is best just to stand to one side and smile and then wait for them to finish. Example questions “Do you sell shoelaces? Why not, you are a shoe store, aren’t you? How can you not sell shoe laces? You sell shoes with laces don’t you? What happens if I buy shoes from you, and one of my laces breaks? Ok, where can I buy shoe laces? Why don’t you know? If you don’t sell laces yourself, you should at least know where I can buy them shouldn’t you? What do Thai ppl do when their laces break? Do they buy new shoes?” When they have finished asking questions it is best to take them to Starbucks for coffee and brownie before going to the next shop.

Wolves like to have part of their body touching your body at all times.

Wolves are outgoing and able to bond with ppl very quickly, and so you often leave them talking to a stranger and come back 2 mins later to find they are telling them stuff that you wouldn’t tell your best friend in the whole world unless you were both very very drunk.

No matter how bad it is, wolves can make it go away with a hug and a lick.